Not good. Not good at all.

I don't like what's going on with me.

I just keep talking and talking without doing anything. 

I keep saying "sorry" over and over again and nothing happens.

Now... I am starting to feel pity for myself. 

Starting to hate myself. 

...

Why am I like this? 

I am suppose to be thankful and let things happen the way it is because having someone likehim is a blessing already. He is very understanding and patient. He puts up with my suckiest attitude and still he loves me the way he loved me before. 

...

Why can't I just be happy for what I have now? 

Why do I always keep asking for more? 

I want this to change... :( 

I want myself to change.

I feel like I'm not mature enough to have a serious relationship... 

I hope things will be okay soon... I really want to stop this... 

He deserve better than this. 

:(