Shadow

I've decided a few minutes ago that... I will start a newer life starting from next week.

I've been hurting for weeks now and it's not healthy staying around my circle of friends because sometimes it makes it worse. There's just too much going on and I can't handle it by myself from getting hurt.

I've been living my life like a shadow for some weeks and it's hard. Mica once told Annie (and i was there) that I've been hiding so many things from her. Well yeah, that's true but it's not only her that I'm keeping secrets from but to everyone. I'm tired telling everyone what I feel when I don't hear and see any support or advice from the people I thought care about what their friends feel... *sigh*

But I'm really glad I've got Mon and Annie to be there for me. They are the two people I know (in college) who I can open things deeply and won't keep quiet when I say something that I can't deal with.

So yeah.. by that..

I thought about coming back regularly to SPO during breaks and after school since I am lacking a lot of hours in my residency as a member of the publications, I've got to gain it back again. And plus, hanging out with my friends is fun but I think taking a time off from them can help me get through my problems. :) I need new things around me. New people I don't know get to talk much to, new environment, new happiness. NEW. NEW. NEW.

I hope this will work.:)

Oh and one more thing. I will try to update as often as I can because I noticed that I remember things easily when I write about it. :) hehe